What's In This Blog

I created this blog for my journal. I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. In this blog I keep many of the things I come across as a member of the church. I also share my experiences on the ACE Train and getting to work, my experiences in Manteca where we have lived for three years, and other things I think are noticeable.

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Book Review: Experiencing Grief (Journeying Through Grief)

I found this book at the library in the used book section.  20c for a book is my kind of book.  This is book two of a four part series: Journeying Through Grief.  (Buying used you don't always get the whole set.)  It is suggested for three months after a loss.  It is written by Kenneth C. Haugk of Stephen Ministries.
I think the most significant thing this book says is "you cannot not grieve."  By this the author is saying that we can put on a happy face, but grief is grief, and we cannot just whisk it away, it will have its day.  The book quotes Therese Rando, "There is no way around the pain that you naturally feel when someone you love dies."  You can't go over it, under it, or around it. ... Going through it is what will help heal you."  The Bible says, "Blessed are those that mourn, for they shall be comforted." Mathew 5:4
Another concept I found interesting was that of firsts.  After a loss, there are many firsts without are loved one.  Holidays and special events become a part of this.  Each in and of it self is a hard time and a reexperiencing of the loss. 
In Isaiah we read of how the Lord can help us through these times:
1...I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine.
 When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.

 Since thou wast precious in my sight, thou hast been honourable, and I have loved thee...  (Isaiah 43)
The Book of Mormon echos this:  17 And I said unto him: I know that he loveth his children; nevertheless, I do not know the meaning of all things.  (1 Nephi 11)
Another concept from the pamphlet is that of secondary looses.  We not only loss a love one, we loss what ever else that person may have been in our life, financial support, listening ear, etc etc.
This pamphlet suggests going through the emotions; it hurts.  A good cry, or many good cries are ok as we deal with this loss.  The pamphlet conclude with; Is it Christian to grieve?  One might also ask, knowing all we do as members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints; Is it Mormon to grieve?  I think the answe  r is a resounded yes.  We can have faith, and still feel pain and loss.  "Jesus wept."  (John 11:35)  Many times we too as mortals need to cry, need to grieve.

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